So I was on Face Book the other day. Not to report what type of crackers I was crumbling into my soup, or if the burning stopped when I pee. I was merely passing through, seeing what my long lost buddies I reconnected with on there was up too. Of course when I found out I really didn’t care as usual, but it was a slow day. What I did find was a high school friend of mine chastising whomever was dissatisfied with the new security regulations and procedures at airports around the country. For those who are unaware, in the name of public safety, the TSA and Home Land Security have ratcheted up the WMD detection tactics when you go through security at the airports. For those airports that have them, you are strongly urged but not required by law to go through the Lex Luther x-ray machine that is able to see you the way your gynecologist sees you. If, however you choose not to go through that potentially dangerous machine, you will receive the “enhanced” pat down. In this case “enhanced” means about 2 pubic hairs shy of a body cavity search.
Now my FB friend believes that we all (yes I include myself in this group) should stop bitching over a simple pat down, because we apparently forgot or haven’t learned our lesson from the dreaded 911 attacks. In short, we should allow everything under the sun to be done to us, EXCEPT be attacked by terrorists again. I’ll tell you flat out, I wasn’t ”in” 911, I didn’t lose anyone in 911, in fact my ass was asleep in bed when all that shit was going down. So maybe I don’t have the emotional history necessary to see his point and the point of all the other Americans who are on his side. Well if that is true, then my response is THANK IMAGINARY GOD FOR THAT! You see boys and girls, it’s not sorrow, or loneliness, or anger that fuels these “security” decisions. The emotion at hand is fear. And I’ll be the first to say that fear is a powerful motivator. Lions, tiger, and bears don’t understand logic, math or diplomacy. But they understand fear. Your children understand fear even before they can spell it. And the government understands fear too. They understand it so well, they now employ it like a sexually confused intern from Boys Town.
Yes, I am one of the nuts who believe a lot of poopy things about our government. And this “pat down” is nothing close to simple. Lets leave the shadowy reasons behind it alone for a minute. Take a look at this YOUTUBE video and tell me if all these people and the people who are reporting it see this as a simple pat down. Oh, pay close attention to the chick at 5 minutes and 10 seconds.
But folks remember, whatever you may think about that video, it’s for our own protection and safety. Our government is here to protect us right? They don’t do things to intentionally harm it’s citizens. This is why you can’t buy illegal guns. This is why you can’t buy illegal drugs. Of course you can buy legal guns and drugs, but I’m sure there is a big difference between them or else the government wouldn’t allow it . . . . for our own safety. In case my sarcasm isn’t filtering through the text properly, let me get to the point. One of the wars America is fighting is the war on drugs. Why? because they kill peiople.
cocaine – roughly 300 deaths per year
Marijuana – roughly 0 deaths per year . . . . . 0? YES . . . 0!!
Alcohol – roughly 100,000 deaths per year
Cigarettes – roughly 438,000 deaths per year
Hey who put booze and cigarettes up there? There is no war on them. That is correct, there is no war on booze and cigarettes. They are both legal to consume as long as you are an asshole over the age of 21. So riddle me this Batman, we are spending BILLION$ of dollars a year, abroad and at home, to make sure that between 100-3,000 Americans never get hurt again from a terror attack. But the government, year after year after year, is allowing a product to be sold LEGALLY AND OVER THE COUNTER, IN PLAIN VIEW OF EVERY COP, FBI, CIA, DEA, SECRET SERVICE, TSA, HOMELAND SECURITY, AND TOKEN BOOTH CLERK IN THIS HYPOCRITICAL HOLE WE CALL THE USA, AND IT KILLS ALMOST HALF A MILLION PEOPLE A YEAR AND THERE IS NO WAR ON IT?!?!?!?!?!? Can anyone tell me why that is? So let me get this straight, the CEO’s of Philip Morris and R.J. Reynolds get to kill thousands of people every year and they don’t have to remove one platinum safety pin from their depends diapers when they board their private jets. But if I wear sweat pants to the airport (cuz I don’t have board members to fellate before my vacations) I have to drop them down to my ankles to make sure my dick is not really a Howitzer. Yeah, sure, it’s just a pat down. I should probably just have a smoke while I wait for my happy ending.
I am THE CSS. Those of you who know me know that I am a man who says pretty much what is on his mind. At times I seem to have little regard for the thoughts or feelings of others. I have been labeled a robot, a monster, detached, and other unfavorable things in my short lifetime. Less than a handful however have ever queried as to why that might be. And to be quite fair, I haven’t extended an invitation to my “inner demons”. Well that is about to change. ... Read More..